This Messy Life— Navigating Sharing Kids, Divorce, Dating, and Blending Families

When we speak of not losing ourselves, what does that mean? For me, it means holding fast to what I know to be true and real. It means finding love and light in all situations.  It means knowing that at times my actions, and staying true to myself, will hurt others. It means knowing that not only am I deserving of love and admiration from myself but that I am deserving of that from others as well. And knowing that if I don’t receive that, it’s ok to let those people go. That it isn’t a failure but choice. And another way to hold fast to myself. It means accepting that not all people will agree with me, or like my choices. But that I have the freedom, right and obligation because I am the ONLY expert in making those choices for myself. These last few weeks have been really hard for me. It’s been hard to show up on social media. It’s been hard to put a smile on my face when I have felt at times like my little world felt so out of control. Between school, and work, and relationships, ...

It’s funny. I took this photo today feeling lean and pretty good about myself. I felt my abs and my waist and felt good. After I took the photo, I though ugh. I look soft. But I kept thinking about it. And I looked back and thought, soft is beautiful too isn’t it?  What did I love, before I was taught that thin, or ripped was beautiful? I think about my kids when they cuddle me. They lay on my soft stomach. They hug tightly to my not always small waist. And the LOVE it. They don’t judge it, or critique it or think I should change it. They just love it. Because they love me. And don’t I deserve that too? So I loved me today. I looked at this photo and the roundness of my stomach and I 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥 it. Not pretending, like really loved it.  I do not have to be perfect to be beautiful. I do not have to hide my wrinkles, or stretch marks, or cellulite or extra weight I’m hanging onto in my belly. I can love every inch of me and still try to be stronger, healthier and even maybe more...